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When you’re finally ready to do it…

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Have you ever had a time in your life where you keep on waiting on someone to do something. You didn’t want to overstep any boundaries or make anyone feel bad, so you just kept on waiting? Then when you were finally tired of waiting and decided to do the thing yourself, they did it.

 

That is what happened to me this morning. I had been waiting for the gardeners to come and take care of the yard. I had been doing it myself, but we went on vacation for 3 weeks and I thought they would take care of the yard. Once we returned from our trip, I found weeds galore. My bushes were unkept and my yard looked horrible.

This disappointed me because the gardeners are paid to keep up the yard. I planted beautiful flowers before in the yard, but I guess I had expected them to do their job especially since I was gone.

I had been waiting and waiting, mostly because I didn’t have the time to do it and also because I didn’t want to do their job for them. Then yesterday, I decided that today, I would go to the store and get the flowers that I really wanted. I would take the time today to plant the flowers and do my yard.

To my surprise, this morning, at 8am, the gardeners were outside doing everyone’s yard.

Can you say frustrated?  That’s how I felt…

I decided that I would let them do their job and just continue on with whatever they left me with. That thought was a good one, until I heard the chopping.

I went to my window and saw them ripping out my beautiful pink flowers. I could feel them ripping them away in my heart…that’s when I couldn’t take it anymore. I opened the door and asked if they were really about to rip out all of my beautiful flowers. The gentleman told me no. He said that they were just trying to get ready for the fall. I didn’t like the idea of them gutting my yard, but I decided to let them do it anyway.

There are a few reasons why I want to share this with you.  I learned a few things and I’m hoping that you will find the lessons helpful.

Reason #1: Perspective

The first reason is that sometimes people are waiting on us to do things. They wait and wait, patiently, frustrated, and trying not to overstep our boundaries. Then when we are finally ready to do the job, they have planned to do it. We show up ready to work, it is almost too late.

If this is a situation that you find yourself in, look at the situation from this perspective.  Try to communicate. The other person cannot read your mind.

Reason #2: Make a Decision

I am sure that the gardeners were busy with their other jobs. They probably had already set the date on their calendars to go out to the homes and prepare each garden for the fall. It just so happened that I took too long to do what I was going to do. I didn’t know what they had planned and they didn’t know that I was also waiting and planning.

We have to either let someone do the job that they are supposed to do or hurry up and do it ourselves. Both situations are not going to work together…at the same time. Only one person can do the job… Only one plan can work.

If you find yourself in this situation, decide what you are going to do and stick with it.

Reason #3: Trust God

This reason is the one that stood out to me the most. There are times when God is doing something that I do not understand. I’m not sure what is happening because He has not revealed all of His plans to me. Yet, I know that His plans are to prosper me. (Jeremiah 29:11)

All I see is weeds growing, things not being done, and my impatience driving me up the wall. Yet, I do not realize that God has it on His calendar to do something in my life, His way. I could try to hurry up and do it, but I might mess it all up.

Waiting on Him is not easy, but this is His job, to work in my life; to take care of me, as my Heavenly Father. He does what only He can do. If I wait on Him, He will take care of everything and have my garden looking beautiful and ready for the Fall…yet it won’t be a pretty sight while He is ripping up all of my weeds and trimming all of my bushes. He might have to gut a few of my beautiful pink flowers because they are not needed or can’t survive the next season. I just have to trust Him and move out of the way so that He can do what He is going to do.

If you find yourself in this situation or can identify with my sentiment, simply, trust God.

Think about it..

When I first started this post, I asked you if you had a time when you were waiting on someone to do something, but you really were planning on doing it yourself. Hopefully you have now thought about each perspectives and not just your own.

Can you see the godly perspective?

That is the perspective that is most important. Waiting on God is wisdom. Moving out of the way so that He can do what He desires it’s the best thing to do. His plans for us are the best plans that anyone could ever have for us, including our own plans.

As I waited inside of my house, with the blinds closed, I wanted so badly to have my hand in my garden. Yet, I restrained myself, because I thought it was best. If you find yourself in a similar situation, be encouraged because you are not alone.

I hope you found encouragement in this post.  Share your thoughts with me in the comment section.

Thanks for reading…

Having An Attitude That Changes Things…Part 2

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This is the second part of my thoughts on Having an Attitude that Changes things.  I did the first part on the radio broadcast.  I also posted the text of the show.

Below you will find the remainder of what I wanted to say…

We have to be able to laugh.  My husband was telling me that I have to learn to laugh at myself.  He said that he has had to learn this skill.  When others crack jokes of point out mistakes, there can be a lesson and a joy that comes to my heart in the midst of it.  Why? Because the joy of the lord is my strength.  I realized that if I can’t laugh about something, I need to get to the root of the why so that I can fix it and find joy.  Of course there will be things that are just not funny, but everything can’t fall into that category.

We have to do this on purpose because this isn’t an easy road.  We have to take these steps, one positive foot at a time.

So that was my challenge today.  I had to continue to have joy and be positive in the midst of the unscheduled events today. I had to turn all of the many negatives into a positive.  We have to take time to adjust or attitude.

How can we check ourselves?

By having an accountability partner.  I have my best friend…

Often times, I’ll run a few things past her.  I’ll ask her about a situation, not telling her what I think just yet.  I’ll get her opinion on it.  She may say that she doesn’t see anything wrong with the situation.  She may also say that she sees a huge problem.  That’s when I tell her my thoughts on it.  We discuss it and this really helps me.

We don’t always have to have a person to discuss these things with.  God gave us the Holy Spirit.  Our conscious will give us warnings….

It’s very easy to be negative especially when our feelings are being hurt.  But we have to realize that we can turn around a situation or the day of someone else when we have a positive attitude.  We should ask others how they are doing with a smile and a encouraging attitude.  We are the light of Christ in the world.  Today God has given us the ability, because we have His Holy Spirit, to help others.  Let’s encourage other people. We never know what others are going through or what situations they are facing.  They may be having a really bad day or simply need a smiling face to encourage them.

You and I can take up this challenge and move forward.

 

 

A Mother’s Perspective

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Recently I have been talking to a couple different mothers about mothering. As I listen to them talk about their kids and their relationships with them, I realize that there are some things that I just don’t think or feel the same as they do…about. I don’t know if that makes any sense. It’s not that we disagree, but instead we don’t see eye to eye because our experiences are different.

For instance, one of the motheres expressed that she doesn’t want to breastfeed her baby past the age of one. I’m sure that many mothers feel this way, and this is their choice, but I don’t feel the same way. Each of my children weaned themselves. It wasn’t when I was ready, but instead when they were ready to stop that we stopped. So I have breastfed up until 11 months, 13 months, and 15 months. I also have a newborn, so I’m not sure how long I will nurse this time.

Another mother that I talked with expressed the fact that she can’t wait for her children to go to bed. By this I mean both nap time and bed time. As she explained this to me, it seemed that she was saying she waits for those times of day because things get to stressful.

I haven’t felt this yet. I have times throughout the day when I know that both my children and I need some personal time. These are moments throughout the day when, we each pull away and have some solitary time doing whatever we desire, within reason of course. I think this is what stops me from waiting for the moment when they will go to sleep. I actually enjoy the company of my children. Yet I think that a mother in a different stage of life may not want to be around her children as much. Especially if she isn’t doing what she needs to do for herself. I always take time for me. Even if it’s just a simple moment in the bathroom with the door locked…emphasis on the door being locked. Without these moments away, I would be no good to myself or my children. I think I would even come to a point of despising them for a lack of personal space. Do I think that’s a normal reaction? Yes I do. Do I think this has happened to this mother? Not yet, but if she isn’t careful it could happen.

Look let’s face it, we all have struggles. I know I do, but it’s the way that we deal with them that’s important. If I found myself in a situation where my thinking was always negative, I would do all that I could to fix it…aka get a new perspective on things.

This is what I’ve seen when talking with these women or even observing others. We have to be willing to think of the other side…the brighter side of things. No one is wrong in this situation, but there is a different way to see it. Each mom is different and so is her experience. Yet, it is our jobs as moms to make each experience the best. Why? It’s simple. We only get to raise each child one time. There won’t be another opportunity for breastfeeding them from birth again. That bond can only be built once. There is no coloring or dancing with them at age 2 or 4 again. I have to make sure that this experience that we have a memorable one. Not because I hated it, but because I enjoyed the moments no matter how wild the ride was…it has to be a good one.

It is my hope that other moms can think the same way. Don’t miss out in those great moments with your kids because you had the wrong perspective. Change the filter in your lens and see it a little different.

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Sometimes It All Looks Grey

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I am sitting here thinking about my day. Being 21 weeks pregnant equals a semi big belly, three kids running around, a husband that needs me, and a big bag of emotions. Now, as I’m thinking about all of this, I felt the urge to write a blog post, but I began to ask myself a question

How am I supposed to write about something, while I’m going through it?

See, the truth is, I have read many blog posts where people are portraying the best parts of their lives, but any true writer begins to write and quickly desires to share it with someone. For me, that’s my blog. I have a journal that I write in frequently, but there are times when is much rather blog about it. I don’t know why, but it feels, like my work has been published and someone who knows how I feel will read it, instead of someone who knows me reading it or no one at all. Now there are some things that I don’t want to publish at all, but what about the things I just want to say?! How am I supposed to write about things that I am going through?

I ask this because I don’t want to put my family out there, embarrass my family or friends, nor do I want to expose things that should not be discussed. I look at the situation and I don’t see any black or white. I want to give God glory in everything, but when I see grey, I am at a stand still.

I just read a blog where the writer talked about things that were, obviously, very hard to discuss, but she is helping a lot of people. I want to have that impact as well. I’m not sure that I can do that when I am seeing grey. Yet I know that there will be times when I’ll have to write about those hard things.

For the time being, I am going to pray, write, and pray some more. Prayer always helps me to see things clearly. I believe it will help me write in a clear way as well. In essence, I’m saying that I want to see things through the eyes of God when I can’t see things clearly and even when I can…