Over the past couple of weeks I have found that the same topics are coming up in my conversations with other moms. I am married with four children and I do a lot.
I blog, crochet, knit, sew, go to school, moderate various groups, and so much more.
I know! That list doesn’t seem like a lot, but I kinda cut it short and used words to summarize my activities.
(I digress) 🙂
The point in saying all of this is that often times people think that because I have four children I have very little time to do much of anything else.
They say things like, “How do you find the time?” and “I don’t have four children and I can’t seem to get what I want done.”
Well, here are my thoughts on this.
First, let me say that I did not learn this over night. It took a some time for me to get what I am about to share with you.
We have to learn to integrate what we love and what we do with who we are.
I get it…that seems confusing, but let me explain a bit.
You and I are both individuals that are very complex. We aren’t as simple as the titles that we carry.
Simply put…you are not just a mother or a wife. You are so much more.
You are the woman that God has created you to be.
The truth is that whether we accept it or not we are who we are. Learning who we are is a great part of this process.
I had to learn who I am. I had to learn what I like and what I don’t like. I had to learn what makes me tick. What makes me smile? What helps & encourages me and what can stop me right in my path.
Again I say, this was a process.
I spent time looking at my life when it was consumed with only being a mother and a wife. Don’t get me wrong, I love being a mother and a wife, but without the “me” part, it can all become a bit robotic.
I learned that my family apprecieates my creative abilities and they take joy in watching me do what I do.
Hence the “Mommy Intergration.” It is the act of incorperating mommy into my life and not the other way around. I am first myself. I am a woman that loves and serves God. I am also a wife who loves her husband. I am also a mother that loves her children. Yet still, I am a woman that enjoys crafting, speaking, reaching out to others, and making a difference in this world. (Or at least trying to)
As I mother, I make time for the things that I enjoy. I sit down to watch the television shows that I like and I allow my children to watch them with me. (This being said, I don’t watch anything that doesn’t promote a healthy godly lifestyle) As my children watch television with me, they learn what its like to just be. Not to be a mother, but to be themselves.
I do this same thing with crafting. I allow my children to sit and watch or at times participate in my crafting activities. This allows them to see that there is a creative side to who I am. They also learn that there is a creative side to who they are as well.
I’m sure you see the pattern here. I take time every month, every week, and everyday to do something that I love and enjoy. I find a way to incorperate what I do with mothering. My children don’t always have to be napping for me to do what I enjoy. They can sit with me as I do it. We can talk about it.
As I do this daily, I find great fulfillment in my life. I am constantly asking God to help me live a life that is fulfilling, pleasing to Him, and encouraging to others, including my children.
As my children see me living as me…not just mom…they learn who they are.
So, if you were to visit my home, you would find lots of singing, dancing, reading, crafting, cleaning, making a mess, playing, taking time out for self, making time for others, and just…well, being…
I hope that I was able to communicate my thoughts on this in a way that is understandable. This is a topic that I have a lot of passion about, so I have so much more to say about it. I just wanted to take a moment a speak on it.
Perhaps in the future I’ll write on it more.
I want to encourage you to find out who you are and to integrate your mommy-ing into your life. I pray that your mothering experience will be as pleasurable as mine is.
Do you every think on this topic? What are you thoughts, challenges, obstacles? Have you found mommy integration an easy thing to do? Leave a comment so we can discuss it.
