I’m not sure if I’m the only mom that thinks this way, but with my fourth baby on the way, I find that I keep asking myself…”Am I enough?”
It’s not that I feel like a bad mother or anything, but there are times when I wonder if I am fully equipped to raise my four children. I thank God that I am not doing it alone. I have my wonderful husband walking alongside me as we bring up these four children.
I think part of my thinking this morning comes from watching too much Law and Order yesterday. It’s been a while since I’ve seen a show, but yesterday there was some sort of marathon on. Since I wasn’t feeling very well, I laid in my bed and watched the T.V.
With each episode, came another devastating situation. With some I wondered what could be done, but with others I asked…how could they? I’m not sure how many I watched, but the various topics got me thinking about life and the consequences of wrong doings. I could go through all the topics, but I’m not. Truthfully, I remember why I stopped watching the show on a regular basis.
Watching the show, yesterday, helped me to see that there are things that we as parents tend to project on to our children. Whether good or bad, these projections affect our children and the adults that they become.
It is my aspiration to raise my children to be responsible, respectable, and reasonable adults. I want to be proud of them, but I also want them to be proud of themselves.
So…back to my question…Am I enough?
Like the cup of juice in the photo, there is a certain amount of juice in it, but it’s up to the observer and their perspective to determine whether the glass is half empty or half full. I am choosing to look at my life and skills that I have been equipped with as…equipped. With that piece of knowledge I don’t stop equipping myself with the tools that I need to continue to improve as a mother an wife, but I am equipped for the time.
I have to remind myself that God would not put more on me that I can bear and these four children are gifts from Him. He must have seen in me what I could not fully see yet, but still chose to make me a mother of four.
I’m not sure what makes good moms go bad or do bad things to their children, but I know that I trust the moral compass and Holy Spirit within me. I will continue to read, study,research, and enquire about the different parenting techniques of raising healthy children. I won’t simply seek the teachings of the world, but that of the Bible because I know that the world is constantly changing its mind, but the Bible remains the same and so does God. As I grow and learn as an individual, it is my prayer that I will continue to be enough for my children.
If you are feeling the same way, I would encourage you to do an evaluation of yourself and then measure yourself through the word of God. If there are any ways in which you believe that you need to improve, ask God for the help. Seek the tools and answers to become better and move forward.
The more we work on being healthy people, spiritually, mentally, emotionally, and physically, the better parents we become for our children. In essence our becoming, becomes enough for them.